Jun
05

Addiction: Cleansing The Wounds!!!

By

Addiction: Cleansing The Wounds!!!

 As I visited www.addictsmom.com, a FREE Membership Site, where mothers of addicts can share without shame, find resources, and see that they are not alone I saw many comments about the wounds left by addicts. These emotional scars carry a huge burden until they are released or cleansed.  Just like a wound on our body these emotional scars should be treated with our own peroxide. Our peroxide can be in the form of spiritual guidance, seeing a counselor, making a decision to detach with love from the addict, and making the conscious decision to stop allowing our child’s addiction to be the focus of our life.  Just as the rain cleanses the earth and replenishes we should see to cleanse and replenish ourselves by making a mind, body, soul connection. The moment we decide to cleanse is the moment we will begin to feel liberated and thus have the ability to move forward with our lives and thus positively impact the lives of others in our family and outside our family?

Addiction: Cleansing The  Wounds – The Steps!!!

 The first step is to remove the stigma of being a parent of an addict. There is no shame in having an addicted child as stuff happens. In many cases there was nothing you did right nor wrong. Addiction happens because of many factors such as low self-worth, the addict doesn’t feel accepted or loved. In some cases it was just a matter that the only parenting skills you had were the skills you learned from your parents. The addict may have felt that you were judgmental and  non-supportive and thus turned to drugs and alcohol as a way to get your attention.  You as a parent probably began to internalize the notion what will everyone think and thus fed into the problem  and thus made it worse, you are not to blame as you were doing the best you could with the tools you have. The key is to remove the stigma stop worrying about what others will think and step up and say my son/daughter is an addict and we are working things out.

 

 Accept that you can not and will not change the addict. The addict must be willing to change him/herself and until they are ready to start the recovery process you must detach with love and stop all interaction. This is painful for all parties, however it is what is necessary if you are going to cleanse the wounds.

 Forgiveness is the next step as you can forgive yourself of any guilt that you may be feeling as you may believe you contributed to the problem. By forgiving yourself and cleansing this wound you will be able to forgive the addict and thus move forward to be of service and value to others.

 It is important to set boundaries with the addict and stick to them. This is very difficult because our mind thinks we are helping in many cases when we are actually hindering. Believe it or not children of any age like structure and rules. IN some cases sticking to the harsh boundaries turns the addict around as they begin their recover process and realize that they too can cleanse the wounds and heal strained relationships. It is in the setting and sticking to boundaries that the healing process can take place.

Addiction: Tools For Cleansing The Wounds!!!!

 With addiction you will put many band aids on the wounds and these band aids will run the gamut of emotions with the hope that one day when you remove the band-aid the wounds will be cleansed and your relationship with the addict can be rebuilt.

    Books such as these can be a great catalyst for you to cleanse the wounds and heal the relationship between you and the addict.

Music often is a great healer as it allows us to shift our thoughts and look at the situation differently as we cleanse the wounds.


 

    Affirmations such as these will serve to cleanse wounds and assist you in your healing.

 Quotes such as these posted or carried with you will assist you in cleansing the wounds.

    Bible verses can be a comfort and a creator of healing as you cleanse your wounds.

Addiction: The Task Of Cleansing The Wounds!!!!

   Now comes the difficult task of Cleansing The Wounds!!! It is up to you to make a commitment to yourself to be the best you that you can be.  In becoming the best you, you must begin to remove the emotional baggage and move forward in a positive direction of your goals. This week, cleanse the wounds by committing to stay positive.

 

Comments

  1. Karen Erickson says:

    What an excellent encouraging message! forgiving myself was absolutely key but..there was something that HAD to come first. My therapist helped me work through it. That thing is RECEIVING forgiveness. The truth is we ALL fall short. And as my therapist so eloquently put it, “If you we’re perfect, there would be no need for Jesus to come, to live, to teach, to suffer, to die for our atonement. God knew before our children were born exactly what our challenges would be as well as our children. We did the best we could with the skills and tools we’d been given and God WILL fill in the gaps IF we step out of His way and let Him. She used the analogy of my son in a pool learning to swim. He is struggling but not drowning but since I’m afraid that he’ll drown I jump in and save him before he has time to figure it out. She also taught me that EVERY time I do something, anything for my son I am reinforcing his feeling that he is not capable of taking care of himself. I am telling him that he isn’t good enough, smart enough, spiritual enough… His self esteem is taken another notch lower. When I say no I also say, “You are capable of doing for yourself, there are plenty of resources available and you need to figure it out on your own because you can.” I remind him that if he is in a recovery program he won’t be hungry or cold at night. YES it’s hard I have little patience and I’ve programmed him to depend on me for so long that I know it will take time, so I pray, and force myself to focus on the positives in my life including the fact that he is still alive, and God’s promise that He will not leave. I have a support group and we work on us. It helps ALOT! I know I would be more of a mess and probably still stuck in my own cycle of self abuse if I didn’t have these ladies (including you). To help me through! <3. Thank you for letting me share! 🙂

Leave a Reply

CommentLuv badge
UA-25348780-1