Archive for Strategies to Overcome Addiction

Apr
25

Addiction: Step By Step!!!!

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Addiction: Step By Step!!!

 

 In the process of recovery it is important to not only have the addict working a program but also to have the family of the addict working a program. So many times a mother or father will get so caught up in the child’s addiction that they suffer emotionally and physically. To avoid this it is important to put together a program that allows you to be healthy both mentally and physically for you are of  no value to anyone if you are not healthy.  In many cases it is as simple of working your own 12 step program.

 

  1. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol—that our lives had become unmanageable.
  2. Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
  3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.
  4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
  5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
  6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
  7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
  8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.
  9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
  10. Continued to take personal inventory, and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.
  11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.
  12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

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Apr
16

Addiction: Taking Steps Of Hope!!!

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Addiction: Taking Steps Of Hope!!!!

 

 As I was sitting down to plan a special event to help mothers of addicted children, Steps Of Hope, I came across this song and thought yes it is time for us to do something. It is time for us to unite and come together to remove the stigma of having an addicted child. It is time for us to band together and show that addiction is affecting us all and that it can be overcome. It is time for us to take steps of hope.

On May 17, 2014 in my hometown of Davie, FL from 10 AM – 12:30 PM I will be hosting Steps of Hope and bringing people together to share without shame in hopes of positively impacting the lives of those affected by addiction.  Each day I take steps of hope by running The Addict’s Mom Facebook Group and overseeing www.addictsmom.com. Read More→

Addiction: Dealing With The Non Addicted Siblings!!!

 

 In 1979 Sister Sledge released the song, We Are Family.  As I began to listen to the lyrics I began to think we are all connected in one way or another.  This connection has been made stronger because of the website www.addictsmom.com, which was started by Barbara Theodosiou, a mother who knew she was not alone when dealing with having addicted children. She developed The Addict’s Mom to give mothers of addicts a platform to share without shame, find resources, and to see that they are not alone. In visiting www.addictsmom.com I came across a question, how do you deal with the non addicted siblings?

 The beginning of dealing with the non addicted siblings is to acknowledge that there is an addict in the family. One way to acknowledge this is to gather the family together and accept the fact that there is an addict in the family. At this family gathering it is important to formulate a plan of action to deal with the addict and all that are affected by the addict’s actions.

Setting boundaries is a very important step in dealing with the addict and your non addicted siblings. Believe it or not most kids want rules and regulations. It is when you set boundaries and explain consequences and stick to the plan that you can positively affect your non addicted siblings.

 It is important to talk to your kids especially the non addicted children. Take an interest in your children, know who their friends are, know what activities they are involved in, make it a point to show interest in your children. Remember you made a conscious decision to bring a child into the world and you have a responsibility to nurture and guide the child the best you can. Be aware they are going to do things where you will have to discipline them and make tough choices, Many times by being strict from day 1 and setting and sticking to boundaries you set in motion the behaviors that lead away from drug and alcohol use. The biggest thing you can do for your children is to speak to them and make time for them. The best words you can ever tell your child is I am here for you. This doesn’t mean financially it means emotionally and spiritually. Read More→

Addiction: Substitution Good Or Bad?

  It seems as in America the trend amongst doctors dealing with addiction is to subscribe to the philosophy of better living through chemistry. It appears that there is a supposed miracle pill for every ailment including addiction. The latest buzz in the addiction treatment field is Suboxone, generically known as buprenorphine and naloxone. It has become so popular that pharmacies are offering coupons for Suboxone.  Many argue that Suboxone is just substituting one drug for another and isn’t an effective treatment as it never truly gets to the root of the addiction. Others argue that it is very effective and that they have had great results.

 Dr. James Schaller is a proponent of using Suboxone and has written his findings in this book.

Many others on the other side point to the side effects and suggest alternative treatments. Read More→

Jun
05

Addiction: Cleansing The Wounds!!!

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Addiction: Cleansing The Wounds!!!

 As I visited www.addictsmom.com, a FREE Membership Site, where mothers of addicts can share without shame, find resources, and see that they are not alone I saw many comments about the wounds left by addicts. These emotional scars carry a huge burden until they are released or cleansed.  Just like a wound on our body these emotional scars should be treated with our own peroxide. Our peroxide can be in the form of spiritual guidance, seeing a counselor, making a decision to detach with love from the addict, and making the conscious decision to stop allowing our child’s addiction to be the focus of our life.  Just as the rain cleanses the earth and replenishes we should see to cleanse and replenish ourselves by making a mind, body, soul connection. The moment we decide to cleanse is the moment we will begin to feel liberated and thus have the ability to move forward with our lives and thus positively impact the lives of others in our family and outside our family?

Addiction: Cleansing The  Wounds – The Steps!!!

 The first step is to remove the stigma of being a parent of an addict. There is no shame in having an addicted child as stuff happens. In many cases there was nothing you did right nor wrong. Addiction happens because of many factors such as low self-worth, the addict doesn’t feel accepted or loved. In some cases it was just a matter that the only parenting skills you had were the skills you learned from your parents. The addict may have felt that you were judgmental and  non-supportive and thus turned to drugs and alcohol as a way to get your attention.  You as a parent probably began to internalize the notion what will everyone think and thus fed into the problem  and thus made it worse, you are not to blame as you were doing the best you could with the tools you have. The key is to remove the stigma stop worrying about what others will think and step up and say my son/daughter is an addict and we are working things out. Read More→

Addiction: Love Is Thicker Than Water!!!

 

 This song was written and performed by Andy Gibb, who died of what appeared to be a heart attack on March 10, 1988. It was believed that his abuse of cocaine led to his heart failing. Andy Gibb was 30 years old. This got me to thinking when are we as a nation really going to take on the issue of drug abuse? When are we going to stop glorifying celebrities like Lindsey Lohan and those who continue to make poor choices?  When  are we going to begin to focus on prevention? If your child never started using the problem of his or her addiction would not be interfering with your life and having a negative effect on your other family members.

 Andy Gibb wrote about love however as you read interviews that he conducted you would see that he didn’t love himself and felt his accomplishments were minor. This could explain his turning to cocaine for like most addicts they turn to drugs because of their lack of self-worth. They do not believe they are deserving of the best and thus they get into a self-destruction  mode and one day they are gone. May parents reading this blog know to well the feeling of loss as they have experienced it first hand and when they hear these songs they bring memories of better times.  Tracking the life of an addict that is still deep into their addiction  brings many answers but also leaves many questions?

 Parents who are dealing with an addict know this cycle all too well and do their best to break the cycle. The question is how did this start? The answer is that your child was lacking a sense of belonging and turning to drugs gave him or her what they were seeking. The next question is why did it continue? It continued because they didn’t feel a need to stop and did not realize the problems their drug use was creating. In some cases what a parent thought was loving became enabling and thus never forced the child to fend for themselves. In some cases it was just the simple fact that it was easier to blame everyone else instead of being accountable for their actions. The question remains how do you break the cycle? The answer is you do not break the cycle the addict must break the cycle. When the addict is serious about recovery then and only then is progress made. You can not guilt your child into getting better, you can not continue to through money at the problem because that doesn’t help, you can’s make excuses as that worsens the problem. The best thing you as a parent can do is to set boundaries and keep to the boundaries. The worst case scenario is that you get that knock on the door saying your child is dead can you identify the body. This happens everyday in America and it is sad because in many cases the loss could have been prevented. The best case scenario is that the addict decides that his poor choices as a result of using no longer serve him or her and they make an effort to stop and get sober and remain sober. Read More→

Addiction: Yellow Ribbons, Yellow Flags, And Hope

 

 Tony Orlando and Dawn’s song Tie A Yellow Ribbon has become an anthem to welcome those returning home. The yellow ribbon on the tree has come to symbolize a love and desire to have the person returning involved in the family. For mothers of addicts they want a clean and sober addict to return home and for the addict they want a caring mother to welcome them with open arms and a whole lot of love. The most difficult task for a mother of an addict is to accept that was has been done is done, the future is uncertain, so accept the moment. A mother of an addict can tie that yellow ribbon and hope for the best. The mother must first and foremost take care of themself by reminding themself that she is special and that she deserves love and respect. Read More→

Addiction: Be The President Of Your Life!!!!

    On Monday 2/18/2013 the country celebrated President’s Day, which originally was the combining of  Lincoln’s Birthday and Washington’s Birthday. The holiday today celebrates all presidents. This inspired to write this entry today to help you to be the president of your life. As I visited www.addictsmom.com, a FREE Membership Site where mothers of addicts can come together and share without shame, find resources, and see that they are not alone I saw many stories of mothers who are at a crossroads in their life and really should take charge of their life and begin to put themselves first. So many of the stories focused on what their child was going through and how they could fix it? The harsh reality is you can’t. The addict has to be the one who fixes it. Many of the mothers told stories of how they are so fraught with despair that they are unable to do for themselves. As I read I kept thinking it is your life be the president of your life. Make an executive order to put yourself first because you can not help others if you aren’t helping yourself.

 One way to help yourself is to visit www.addictsmom.com and see how other mothers are putting themselves first. It is important to take control of your life and understand the addict is going to do what they are going to do. You can not live their life. You can give them all the advice in the world, you can give them emotional and spiritual support, you can even help financially, however until they are fully committed to the process of getting clean it will remain a revolving door. The harsh reality is that you did not cause the addiction the addict made the choice to use and they now have a choice to keep using or to stop? The addict is also the president of their life. Read More→

Addiction: Breaking The Grip: Focus on Prevention!!!

           

 

Today I went to www.addictioninfo.org to research information for this blog so as to be of service and value to the readers who may be facing the challenges of having an addict in their life. I found an article about the health risks of smoking, a controversial article about the use of a prescription drug to replace the addiction of another drug,  and an article on why cancer patients can’t stop smoking. As I read these articles I began to think of what can a parent do to alleviate the drug use, smoking, alcohol use, and other addictive behavior?

 When The Addict’s Mom hosted its monthly roundtable, which is now available at 605-477-2199 pin 131099# reference #34, with guest Denny Coates, whose website, www.strongforparenting.com, goes more into detail about the teenage brain, we discussed the many reasons why a teen starts to use alcohol, drugs,or smoke and we came to the consensus that the only way to stop the use is through prevention. Read More→

Addiction: Matt Mitcham Is One Of Many Who Has Overcome Addiction!!!

             

Beijing gold medalist Matt Mitcham says that a former meth addiction nearly destroyed his career–and his life.

In his upcoming book, Twists and Turns, Mitcham describes how issues with anxiety, self-esteem and depression led him down a bumpy road of drug use and, eventually, dependence. In his book, to be released Monday, Mitcham says that through the help of 12-step program Narcotic Anonymous and the support of friends and family, he was able to come to terms with his addiction and is now managing as a drug-free athlete.

Matt Mitcham’s story is that like many that have used drugs or alcohol as a way to try to escape only to find that in life once drugs and alcohol become the most important part of your life you eventually go into a downward spiral until one day you realize that this is not what you want and you decide to get help and make a commitment to get better. Looking at Matt Mitcham you would never know he was an addict.You would think here is a guy living his dream how could he allow drugs to nearly destroy that dream? Mitcham stated he knew the dangers of Meth yet did it anyway and now he hopes to share his story so others won’t start or if they end up addicted that they seek help and get on a path to recovery. Read More→

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