Archive for Strategies to Overcome Addiction

Addiction: Underage Drinking, Heroin, Bon Jovi:Things That Make You Say WTH!



As I began to research for today’s entry I typed in to Bing Addiction In The News and the first thing that struck a chord was Underage Drinking Still An Issue Across The Nation. This did not surprise me as this is something that has been going on for ages. The question is why do most kids under 21 choose to drink. Some say all my friends are drinking and I want to fit in, which is where we as adults must make them feel important and comfortable enough to not give into the idea of fitting in. Some of the kids will sy I enjoy it, it relaxes me this is where you begin to teach alternatives like meditation, exercise, journaling, and other ways other than drinking.


The fact that most kids who do drink start at age 12 really made me say what the hell, then I remembered the story of me at The Passover Sedar, drinking all the left over wine and instead of the adults stepping in and stopping me they all said look how cute little Jonathan is getting drunk. This is where the issue starts for most kids they are allowed to drink and then they do stupid things and instead of being held accountable for their actions they are encouraged.  The key is to look for the warning signs and then begin to communicate with your children. There were many parties in my youth where there was drinking involved and in many cases the parents were at the parties and they said go ahead and you can sleep over in many cases the parents bought and provided the beer. The parents allowed this to happen and then years later wondered why many of the kids had issues associated with alcohol use. There are those that say if we didn’t have a drinking age and if we didn’t make alcohol taboo that the incidences of alcohol related issues would decrease. The key is how you as a parent deal with the issue of your child drinking. The issue of alcohol use is quite complex because we tend to glorify it as stated in a previous blog entry. I personally stopped using alcohol at age 27 as my doctor informed me of the damage I had already done to my body and how the continued use of alcohol could further hurt me. I now go out and my drink of choice is water or unsweetened iced tea. Read More→


Addiction: Hey Brad Keselowski Stop Glorifying Alcohol!!!!

After Brad Keselowski won The Sprint Cup Championship he immediately alluded to going to celebrate by having a few drinks. This struck a nerve with me because he represents something that is truly ironic in our society driving a car sponsored by Miller Lite at a high rate of speed. Miller runs ads about not drinking and driving and then sponsors a race car driven by someone whose first word were there will be drinking involved and then the next morning he talks about not being as hungover as he thought he would be.  Some would chalk it up to his immaturity. Come on people the man is 28 years old and should know better as many young kids are watching NASCAR and look up to Brad and will justify their poor decisions by saying well Brad does it and he makes millions of dollars and won a Sprint Cup Championship. Read More→

Addiction: A New Day, A New Beginning, A New Perspective!!!

by Jonathan Lederman – Media Director – The Addict’s Mom –

Today is a new day. Yesterday is gone and tomorrow is not promised that is why today is a present. Like a new gift it is up to you to  decide how you will use the gift of this new day. To help you in your quest to face the challenges that you may be going through it is important to remember you may have had a hand in the creation of the situation, however you also need to stop beating yourself up about it and live in the moment and not try to go back or project ahead.

  As I write this the rain falls outside my window due to the weather conditions created by Hurricane Sandy. While there may be a hurricane brewing outside I choose to be bright and sunny on the inside by shining a light of hope to those who are facing challenges.  The challenges you may be facing are being faced by many as evidenced by the many stories at so you know you are not alone. The choice you make as to what type of day to have is up to you. You can choose to be consumed by the behavior of the addict and continue to attempt to be the rescuer or you can let the addict live their life and knowing you did everything you could to help him or her.  The decision to have a bright sunny day comes from inside of us. One way to create a bright sunny day is to make and commitment to statements like whatever happens today I will find something good in what happens. By using affirmations and positive quotes like the ones below you will begin to create a bright sunny day from within and thus regardless of any outside forces you choose to be positive. Read More→

Addiction: Addiction and 9-11; The Recovery Process

 It was 11 years ago today when the tragic events of  9-11 occcured. As I sat to write this post I began to think how the events of 9-11 and the recovery process parallel the stages of an addict and a family in recovery. I begane to think forst there is acceptance that something bad has happened or is happening, then there is the realization that you need help to recover from these events, and at the end you are triuphant as you move forward in a path to recovery.

 As people came out of the rumble and began to help one another there was sense of togetherness that came over our country, people were a bit nicer to one another and began to help eachother. It is a shame that it takes tragic events to bring people together, howver when people share a similar experience they are more apt to come through it and recover. With addiction it takes the family and friends to pull together and help the addict come through the recovery process. This will not be easy as itr hasn’t been easy for all theose affected by 9-11, however by taking the first step toward recovery people will be healed and will be able to let go of the past and move forward. Read More→

Addiction: Polarity Explored, Pull Don’t Push

by Jonathan Lederman- Media Director – The Addict’s Mom


As I read the entry in Mary Morrissey’s Book The Miracle Minute about  her discovery with her rolling bag that she used in her travels and how she discovered that pulling the bag was much easier than pushing the bag I began to think how many times are we trying to push something on someone instead of pulling them along with us to experience our joy and successes. I thought about polarity,which is defined as

  • extreme difference: a situation in which two people or groups have qualities, ideas, or principles that are diametrically opposed to each other
  • opposite physical characteristics in system: the condition, in a system, of having opposite characteristics at different points, especially with respect to electric charge or magnetic properties.

and how many time the first definition enters into the cycle of dealing with an addict.  How many times have you found yourself on the phone with the addict or in a face to face and you realize that your view points are very different and are coming from a different place. Many times it is a battle because we are so determined that our way is the best way and the other person is just as determined to show their way is the  best way. Instead of being so driven to show you are right, say that is an interesting point I never though of it that way. Read More→


Addiction: Working The Steps

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Addiction: Working The Steps

by Jonathan Lederman – Media Director – The Addict’s Mom

The journey of 1,000 miles starts with the 1st step – Lao Tzu

When dealing with addiction it is important to take the 1st step and decide that you will fix the issue. For a family member it is important to be supportive of the issue and to be committed to helping the addict work the steps without becoming co-dependant or enabling. Recently I found a description of  the twelve steps on Wikipedia.

A Twelve-Step Program is a set of guiding principles (accepted by members as ‘spiritual principles,’ based on the approved literature) outlining a course of action for recovery from addiction, compulsion, or other behavioral problems. Originally proposed by Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) as a method of recovery from alcoholism,[1] the Twelve Steps were first published in the book Alcoholics Anonymous: The Story of How More Than One Hundred Men Have Recovered from Alcoholism in 1939.[2] The method was then adopted and became the foundation of other twelve-step programs. As summarized by the American Psychological Association, the process involves the following:[1]

  • admitting that one cannot control one’s addiction or compulsion;
  • recognizing a higher power that can give strength;
  • examining past errors with the help of a sponsor (experienced member);
  • making amends for these errors;
  • learning to live a new life with a new code of behavior;
  • helping others who suffer from the same addictions or compulsions.

 The 1st step is to recognize that you have a problem and that you are not alone. By being conscious that you have a problem you can begin to take steps to fix the problem. For the family it is important to realize that the addict has a problem and not to be judgemental or angry but supportive and kind in the dealings with the addict. The problem did not happen overnight and it will not be solved over night. I often suggest a family meeting to address the problem with the ground rules that there will be no judgement and that a sacred space is being created to help the family overcome this challenge. In a perfect world the addict would step up and say family I have a problem and I need your help and this would begin the healing process. Read More→


Addiction: Understanding The Addict

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Addiction:Understanding The Addict

by Jonathan Lederman- Media Director- The Addict’s Mom

 When you look at this photo ypu will see that the normal brain has all the synapses in place designed to function and deliver messages properly where ase the addict’s brain has several holes and thus the messages are skewed as the processing center has been damaged. The addict turned to drugs and alcohol for many reasons and to understand the addict you must understand how their primordial brain acts and how their ID and Ego interact.  An addict may feel that they are unloved or picked on and thus turned to drugs and alocohol as an escape or to find acceptance.

Wikipedia defines addiction as follows

Addiction is the continued use of a mood altering substance or behaviour despite adverse dependency consequences,[1] or a neurological impairment leading to such behaviors.[2]

Addictions can include, but are not limited to, alcohol abuse, drug abuse, exercise abuse, and gambling. Classic hallmarks of addiction include: impaired control over substances/behavior, preoccupation with substance/behavior, continued use despite consequences, and denial.[3] Habits and patterns associated with addiction are typically characterized by immediate gratification (short-term reward), coupled with delayed deleterious effects (long-term costs).[4] Physiological dependence occurs when the body has to adjust to the substance by incorporating the substance into its ‘normal’ functioning.[5] This state creates the conditions of tolerance and withdrawal. Tolerance is the process by which the body continually adapts to the substance and requires increasingly larger amounts to achieve the original effects. Withdrawal refers to physical and psychological symptoms people experience when reducing or discontinuing a substance the body had become dependent on. Symptoms of withdrawal generally include but are not limited to anxiety, irritability, intense cravings for the substance, nausea, hallucinations, headaches, cold sweats, and tremors. Read More→


Addiction: Coming Out Of The Dark

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Addiction: Coming Out Of The Dark

by Jonathan Lederman- Media Director- The Addict’s Mom

 Gloria Estefan released this song shortly after her tour bus crashed and she was left with a broken back and didn’t know if  she would ever perform again. She decided to move forward and to overcome adversity. She shows  that you can come out of the dark. Her song inspired me to write this blog entry to help those reading it to come out of the dark.

Addiction: Ways of Coming Out Of The Dark

 One way to come out of the dark is to turn to your faith and to embrace the fact that you are a child of God and that your children are children of God.  There are many great books that you can find to help you with a faith walk as you face the challenges  of addiction.

Rev. Dr. Dee Adio Moses gives you 365 daily devotionals to help you Heal Your Life.Reverend Dr. Dee Adio-Moses is an ordained Minister, Pastor, International Spiritual Teacher, Life Coach and above all a vessel for God’s Divine Healing.

She is devoted to helping people move to a higher level of consciousness, no matter where they are in life. She teaches that “Over-flowing abundance is your birthright and your life must reflect this, if not, the awakening of the soul to the realization of this divinity and thus the greatness is all the work that needs to be done.”

A prolific bible teacher, her passion, her innate gift and her ability to take the spiritual and translate it into the practical, have been the foundation of the success of her ministry.

Dr. Dee will assist you on your journey; countless people have seen their lives transformed by working with her in the last 20 years of Spiritual and Life Coaching, expect yours to be the next one.  Dr. Dee is the Founder, Spiritual Leader and Pastor of Healing Center of Christ International and of Life Empowerment, Inc., a non-profit organization.  She is a trained metaphysician with a PhD in Psychology specializing in Holistic Life Counseling. Read More→

Addiction: The New Community- Guest Post by Jeff Zelaya Courtesy of


Spiritual Awakening: The New Community

Guest Post by Jeff Zelaya

       When you think of the word Community what does it mean? Think of that for a second. Got it? Hold that thought until the end. In 2012 we are evolving the meaning of Community with social media. Let’s break it down, Community can be defined as a group of people living or interacting in the same  space, and a society that helps each other. In the past, your  interaction with your community ended when you were no longer physically in the same place. Now, thanks to the glories of the interwebs, we  bring our community home and further expand our network beyond the  physical. Indeed, most people find it odd for someone not to have a Facebook account. A normal person functioning in society is believed to be someone that  is engaged in his/her community. Facebook is now part of life and if  you’re not on it then you’re considered to be isolating yourself from  your community. In social media we are interacting and helping each other, whether it is to make a professional connection, find old friends or make new ones, we are expanding our life experience day-in and day-out. The internet is a known space where interactions happen. Think about the last time you were  considering who you should donate to and you saw something come up on a  social media platform posted by a friend. At that moment you experienced a moment of clarity, “OMG, I have to help my friend!” Yes– O-M-G. Not only have we expanded our communities but we have evolved our language as well. ROFL, TTYL and LMAO had no meaning 15 years ago and now you know exactly what they mean and people even use them in verbal communication. What does community mean to me? It means being connected and in 2012, social media is part of how we make that connection. Now you can let go of  that thought you had in the beginning. Share in the comments! What does Community mean to you?


Jeff Zelaya Shares his insight about The New Community

Guest Post by: Jeff Zelaya Jeff Zelaya is a sought after Digital Marketing Executive and one of the most recommended Marketing Consultants and Public Speakers on LinkedIn. You can check out his marketing blog here:


Addiction: Playing The Blame Game!!!

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Addiction: Playing The Blame Game!!!

By Jonathan Lederman- Media Director- The Addict’s Mom



Celebrities like Lindsey Lohan, Macauley Culkin,  and Joey Kovar make the news for problems with alcohol and drugs and quickly viewers start to play the blame game and point fingers at society, at the parents, at Hollywood. People blame the individual saying how with allthat money can you be unhappy and have a desire to turn to drugs and alchol? The answer is not an easy one as to why people choose to use drugs and alcohol or who is to blame, howver let’s start with the parents and see what type of behavior was being modeled?  Now let’s turn to the child and see how they have been treated and how they are seeking acceptance? Many times a child will model the behavior that they observe. Children want to be accepted and if they find a group that is using drugs and alcohol and they feel they fit in guess what they will start using drugs and alcohol.



Addiction doesn’t only affect celebrities it affects everyday people as well as they are seeking to be accepted or to be liked. Some choose to drink or do drugs as they feel it will make their problems go away. The truth is the answer was never found at the end of a line or a needle or the bottom of a glass. We can be quick to point fingers and play the blame game or we can find out the true root of the issue and begin to help the addict, however the addict has to be committed to getting clean and stop blaming others for their circumstances. It is when we become accountable for our actions that we begin the healing process and stop playing the blame game.

Addiction: Resources To help You Stop Playing The Blame Game

 This book and others could be a great resource for you to help you to stop playing the blame game.


  Ask yourself what behavior am I modeling when I am with my child? If you are drinking heavily or using drugs your child most likely will model this behavior. If you are loud and beligerent the child will learn this as acceptable behavior. If you are peaceful,supportive, and kind most likely your child will model this behavior. Think of what you are saying and how it is affecting the child. Ask yourself am I playing The Blame Game?

 When you stop playing the blame game and walk your faith you will see that all the answers lie in you. Many will continue to blame and never take responsibility for their actions until and will continue to struggle. The struggle stops when you stop playing the blame game.