Addiction: Don Miguel Ruiz Turns Lives Around With Four Agreements!!!


Addiction: Don Miguel Ruiz Turns Lives Around With Four Agreements!!!


As I read the stories in The Addict’s Mom Facebook Groups and at www.addictsmom.com I began to think what one tool could I give to the mothers of addicts that may assist them with their struggle? The answer came in the form of Don Miguel Ruiz’ book, The Four Agreements. The four agreements is based on Toltec Philosophy.  As I looked at each agreement I began to think that every mother of an addict should have a copy of the book and every addict should have a copy.  If the addict truly wants recovery and the joys of being drug and alcohol free he/she will make an effort to follow the four agreements. These agreements are made by the individual to themselves so as to have a greater connection to GOD and thus begin living the life that GOD intended. If you work on these agreements with the addict when they are ready to receive and take positive action to improve their life you will begin to see improvements in your relationship with the addict.


 Lets examine The Four Agreements:

1: Be impeccable with your word – This is very important as it relates to the setting of boundaries and truly helping the addict on their path to recovery. Remember if you say you are not going to have interaction with the addict until they are clean for 30 days stick to this because if you do not you will only create more stress and drama for the situation. Remember your words have power and the message you deliver can be the turning point to turn the addict’s life around.

2: Don’t make assumptions – This is difficult when your addict has a pattern that they follow and you are well aware of it. Don’t assume if you do it for them that they will stick to it there comes a time when the addict has to fend for themself. You can not assume that they will get clean or that they will die on the street all you can do is to let go and let GOD and take of yourself in hopes that your actions will be positive enough to turn the addict around.

3: Don’t take anything personally – This is another tough one especially if you have given the addict financial support and you begin to feel used and then you begin to get angry and thus make the situation worse. A good method to use is to understand that the addict did it to themselves and made the choices they have made. You can write and say and apply this phrase In The Past and Up Until Now I was part of the problem because of choices I made concerning my addict, starting now I will make better choices and improve the situation.

4: Always Do Your Best – As a parent you can only do your best and not judge yourself as you learn from each incident that occurs. If you are giving 100% and taking care of your self and making what you believe are positive decisions than you will be able to deal with your addict in a more positive light.

Addiction: The Fifth Agreement

 This is the fifth agreement and it will be a big factor in helping you to turn things around. The key is to listen and question in a loving and kind manner so you can truly get to the root of the issue and help the addict to overcome their addiction. This can only be done if the addict is open to receive.  Think about why the addict is asking you for things what are their true motives. Listen to the way they are asking, observe their tone and if in person their body language. One thing I have observed is that addicts are great manipulators so by being skeptical you protect yourself from making choices that only made the situation worse.

 As you apply the agreements and learn to be forgiving you will see a change in the way the addict behaves towards you and how you feel about the addict.

You can visit www.miguelruiz.com to learn more about how the teachings of Don Miguel Ruiz and Don Jose Ruiz can help you in turning lives around.

     As you begin to use the teachings of Don Miguel Ruiz and Don Jose Ruiz you will begin to find that love, kindness, and forgiveness will flow to you and from you as you turn lives around starting with the life of the addict.  Remember in order to turn the addict around the addict mus be ready to fully commit to the recovery process.  Stay Positive Today!



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